Healers West

DEFINITION OF HEALTH COACHING: (short version, still in progress):  Health Coaching is the opportunity for an individual to become empowered to discover and develop a personal sense of wholeness and well-being through collaborating with a skilled  health coach professional, often resulting in personal transformation including a renewed sense of meaning, wellness, health and healing.

DEFINITION OF HEALTH COACHING (longer version, still in progress): Health coaching empowers clients to know themselves and create health and well-being through the presence of a coach who gently guides them to discover their own answers to the questions that seem to matter most to us all: Who am I? What is my self-image? Who do I want to be? Why am I here? What is my mission? What is my life vision? What do I want? What do I need? What works in my life and what doesn’t? How can I create health and balance? How do I deal with a life-threatening disease? How do I deal with terminal illness? How do I cope with the aging process?

Health Coaching questions are spiritually based, universal, self-awareness questions. As humans beings we share a need to have someone witness our life. A health coach accompanies and witnesses a client discover and manifest the life he/she desires by empowering him/her to find the answers from within. Clients learn to make conscious choices in order to bring about increased mental, physical, emotional and spiritual balance, thus contributing to their overall sense of health and well-being. Health coaching offers opportunities for clients to discern, explore and manage their obligations, wants, needs, behaviors, habits, patterns, strengths, weaknesses and stressors. Individuals have a chance to realize how they are treating themselves and whether they are equally healthy and engaged in all aspects of their lives (occupational, emotional, social, intellectual, spiritual and physical). Coaches help clients define and envision personal goals by empowering them to make necessary choices and changes. In the process, clients often transform and experience healing. In addition, health coaches have access to, and knowledge of, holistic and integrative health resources to aid clients on their journey towards a greater sense of total well being.

Through being witnessed, we develop a sense of meaning because we have the experience of not being alone.  Even if it is for just one moment, if the other person is present, we experience the fact that our life touched someone else’s life, and at that point, we know we are not alone.  The bigger questions, those concerning life and death, love and fear, create what we understand of our lives. A witness tells us that our life has meaning because we share the commonality of being “spiritual beings on a human path” (From Jean Shinoda Bolen, M.D. “Close to the Bone: Life Threatening Illness As a Soul Journey).

As health coaches we are encouraged and trained to use our intuition as we listen to a client holistically which can help lead them to a deeper understanding and connection between their mind/body/spirit. Coaches use intuition to help clients get in touch with their own inner knowing, self discovery and solutions. Health coaches create safe space when they are completely present and authentic, honoring the higher Self of the other and connecting to them from their own higher Self. In that sacred space, a healing energy field is created and coaches are taught to pay attention to unspoken messages which may appear as bodily sensations, visual images, gut feelings or intuitive hits. A coach “listens” to his or her own body, (as well as the visual and energetic clues from the physical client in front of them). Coaches may perceive visual messages, sensations or notions that arise which can be intuitive clues as to what their client might be experiencing. This enables health coaches to discover and draw out their client’s own inner knowing, based on his/her own inner knowing. It is an inner knowing exchange!The coach checks out  his/her intuitive hits with the client to see if they apply to the client’s experience. Often, what is intuited is a direct message from the client’s unconscious Self which energetically passes on to the coach. Coaches also use the knowledge of energy, energy healing, and energy systems (chakras etc.) to inform their intuition which helps the client make sense of the mind/body/spirit connection. The role of intuition for coaching is part of a holistic approach to healing where accessing unconscious information can often speed up consciousness sand thus the healing process.

Healthcare professionals such as therapists trained in Jungian or Transpersonal therapies, massage therapists, Reiki, Touch for Health, Chiropractors etc. rely on their intuition when they make choices of how and where to work with, or work on, their clients.  Most Allopathic healthcare workers are not trained to intentionally focus on building their intuition “muscle” in order to empower their clients. I am sure that many medical doctors use intuition however, unlike coaching, the role of intuition is not  specifically encouraged or spoken about in medical training. Nurses also use their intuition, although again, it is not necessarily taught as a skill. (I might be wrong)  Most healthcare professionals who are trained to think scientifically are not trained to be open to the idea that intuition can be used as a tool to help a client uncover, discover, recover from or cope with health issues.

It seems that intuition has the largest role in health coaching because it is the key tool which enables the coach to draw out and connect with direct inner healer knowing of the client. This is how clients are able to come up with their own healing solutions and inner strengths. As far as other forms of “integrative” healthcare, usually the actual healer follows their own intution in order to guide their therapy or make certain decisions, but they are not necessarily using intution to draw out the clients personal inner healer.

I use intuition in my work as a Flower Essence Therapist and also in the past while working as psychotherapist in training. In order to access my intuition, I create sacred space, connect with what I call God energy, as well as my Higher Self, and all my guides and angels. I then ask to connect with the Higher Self of my client and all of their guides and angels.  Using a pendulum, I ask to be guided in choosing essences for the client. It is amazing that the essences that come up for each client are exactly what that individual needs or wants. Often there are essences that show up to help with issues that were not initially evident to the client, but once they hear which essence came up, they readily confirm that that specific essence makes total sense. In this way, I have been able to choose essences that I would not thought of, had I based the decision solely upon my conversation with the client. I work at a distance as well and find that the healing connection is equally created energetically so that I am guided to the correct essence formula even when the client is not present.

“Is the fish wild or farm fed?” (They usually don’t know and have to go ask someone)

“Is the filet corn fed or grass fed?” (Ditto)

“May I please have it well done and not medium?” (Not such a problem)

“Is it goat or cow feta?” (They are always miffed by this one as they assume that feta is goat but both kinds exist)

“May I please have the dressing on the side? Then later I ask for olive oil. (Pain in the butt)

“Is it organic?” (A simple yes or no usually follows)

“Do you use MSG?” (Depends upon where you are but most will say no anyway and I    am impressed when they say yes that they tell the truth!)

“Is the soup made with milk or with cream?” (Never an immediate answer they always have to go check and ask about that one)

“Is the soy sauce low sodium?” (They never know for sure but they make the answer up)

“Is there flour in the sauce?” (They usually think that they know the answer to this question but they don’t)

“Do you have anything that is Gluten Free?” (They usually have no clue)

“Is the sauce made with butter?” (This can also be really confusing because I can have butter and cream but otherwise I am milk-free)

“Can I have the eggs benedict with no bread and no ham?” (What’s the point?)

“Are the eggs organic and/or fertile?” (So far I wonder about this but I have not yet asked as I am sure there is no answer to this question)

Water without ice; wine without sulfates; Mojito with splenda, the list goes on.

They all probably wonder why I go out to Restaurants at all.

I always warn the waiters that I am one of those complicated “orderers”. When I am on the East Coast, I just use the excuse that I am from California. When I am in California, I just explain to them that I am “one of those people” because I know that they know what I mean (I am not the only one!). I warn them because I assume they are not going to like me because of my special needs. This is how it was when I was younger. Back then, in restaurants I asked for meat well-done, hearts of lettuce with nothing but salt, and ate only white things: white bread with butter and turkey, angel food cake with white frosting veal which was pretty close to white, and pizza slices with everything wiped off. I guess special food orders were the way I could exert my power because it was the only aspect of my life that my mother could not control. I also believe it was my way of getting attention (I was the fifth child of ten pregnancies, five survivors). But my mother always made a huge deal, scolded me and apologized to the wait staff for my neediness. It just was not acceptable or polite to have needs.

That’s probably one reason why I warn the waiters-I want them to like me. I can not tolerate being disliked. Unknowingly, in this weird way I form a kind of immediate connection with the waiter because we have bonded over my needs. I have told them my needs and they are usually happy to comply and I usually get what I want. They want to make me happy. I exerted my power by challenging the “heaven forbid that I draw attention to my needs” in a restaurant because my mother cared more about what other would think if she argued with me in public. Now, when I actually get what I want, I feel like I deserve it. Sometimes the waiters make a big fuss and they are so proud of what they were able to accomplish to make me happy and I am always impressed. I also reward them with an appreciative tip. For awhile, being a cancer patient meant that I had a good excuse for getting my needs met. Now that it has been a few years I no longer want to use cancer as an excuse to get what I need. Excuse. That may be the key word here. What is my excuse now? What was my excuse for the past 50 years of my life. Why do I need an excuse to express what I want or what I need in order to get attention, be liked or take care of myself? Food for thought.

My friend and colleague who is a marriage and family therapist and writer, Tracey Cleantis, LMFT,  traceycleantis.com recently wrote a blog called “Write a blog, change your life” http://www.labeletterouge.com/2010/09/write-a-blog-change-your-life.html Yesterday, I posted my first blog and it changed something because I could not sleep after I posted it! I started writing all kinds of blogs in my head! Luckily, I had ordered some spray bottles of flower essences from FES www.floweressencesociety.com which is called FLORASLEEP which I had planned to sell at one of my classes. You just spray a few squirts under your tongue and you know what? They work!

You might wonder why a blog affected my sleep. It has to do with the fear of blogging. One of my fears about writing a blog has to do with the fact that I am kind of a perfectionist and I want what I write to be perfectly clear. I want to be able to express my feelings on paper so to speak, but I am afraid that words always fall short. When I feel something, it is very hard to put those feelings into words, therefore, I want the words to be perfect. My writing with words is weak primarily because I am not a “big reader” (I am a recovered, self-diagnosed, ADHD-er). I remember my sister loved to read and I was much younger so when she read I would also pretend to read and BOY was that boring. (It is not really her fault but this is really how I came to think that reading was boring). Recently, my new excuse for why my written English is weak is because I lived abroad for 17 years and had to learn four other languages as well as speak really simple English in order to be understood. Up front then, my disclosure is that writing is not my strong suit.

The other fear that haunts me is the nagging thought that “who am I to think that anyone might be interested or care at all about what I write?” What does that feel like to have someone read your thoughts or feelings and then comment on them? Will I care or get offended if I am criticized? Most likely my true fear of blogging (and this is where my Jungian Therapist training kicks in) is really about being “seen”. Continue reading →

I call myself a Health Coach (or a Wellness Coach) but it doesn’t mean that I am healthy! The term has come to life over the past few years and the field is on its way to becoming regulated and standardized.

My life experiences led me to learn (mostly the hard way) about the mind-body connection. This meant I was lucky enough to be able to deal with breast cancer primarily by using complementary and alternative therapies. After this experience, I had an intense urge to share my experience with others because I felt I could understand what they were going through. I hoped to offer them another point of view which might help them along healing journey.

Although I have my Masters in Counseling Psychology, when I became a therapist I did not think about focusing on working with people who were dealing with physical illnesses. Having lived in Germany, Brazil, Mexico and Spain I had been exposed a great deal to alternative medicine yet I never was able to put the world of therapy and complementary medicine together until I heard the term “Health Coach”. Once I decided to try to help people deal with their illnesses by telling them my story and sharing my limited but first hand knowledge of various healing modalities, people from all over the world started to call me and ask my about my healing experiences. For lack of a better name and mostly for insurance purposes I chose the title “Wellness Coach” which means I can teach and give advice.

Suddenly, I was spending a good deal of time on the phone helping people understand what I have come to learn about the mind-body connection and the various complementary and alternative therapies which helped me. However, the number one lesson I learned was that every single individual is different and no one can ever really tell anyone else what to do. The best I can do is share my story, and my personal experience and beliefs. Continue reading →